Tyne Tour 2005 - Ollie
The Tyne Tour promised to be a montage of drinking paddling and general craziness
and it was with this in mind that I sprinted through campus (stopping only to give
directions to bemused prospective students) in an attempt to catch the mini bus.
Unfortunately I was fifteen minutes late and jumping in a waiting car I was forever to be
regaled with tales of the nudity which ensued in my could-have-bin ride. After hastily
erecting tents in a random fashion we got down to the serious business of drinking and
soon, with the arrival of more busses and cars, wound our merry way to donito’s nightclub.
After frolicking some of the wonderful locals (”yoos shoutin’ in mah ear while ah’m tryin’
t’ talk t’ yeh pals!” .. such a warm race of people), drinking like fish and dancing like
fools we decided to head back to camp (via a kebab shop).
Although most of us retired by four that morning I was kept awake by some rather
noisy cows and eventually decided to mingle with the nice folks at Loughborough
university (who had risen at seven o’clock!!??). By nine most people were up and after a
hasty bacon sandwich and reshuffle of the tents (with appropriate faff) we set off in
full regalia for the Tyne.
The eight mile stretch we paddled had some very fun rapids and though I swam not
once but twice it was trés cool, not least a mass surf half way down. Very knackered and
quite cold we got out at the campsite, showered and headed up to spoons for a hot meal.
After more drink and faff and a fun free firework show enjoyed from the top of the mini
bus it was ceilidh time… dancing to crazy folk music in complicated couple based stuff
was what we all needed and along with alcohol both purchased and snuck in it descended
into semi-chaotic spinning and jigging for all. Some of us (or maybe all) made our own
random dances up with many a “this way, this way!!” and the odd “right hand star!!”. By
the end of the night not only had I managed to be a girl in the square dance (very fun
and mildly dangerous) but also done some freestyle westside hardcore ceilidh dancing
with jess, met a Scottish guy who put horses on shoes (or the other way round) and done
some trolley surfing into a bush with bob et al. The night progressed with scatterings
of inebriated Sheffield, Loughborough and Birmingham uni folks an attempt at a fire and
a cracker eating contest. We just had time to find an unconscious non-responsive guy get
him admitted to hospital and laugh at the comments his dad would make at being phoned at
between the hours of four and six in the morning because his son had drunk way too much
and fallen asleep in a field before going to bed.
Waking up with my tentmate Ste pressed lightly against me I realised it was two
in the afternoon and after breakfast we discovered, alas, that most of the Leeds crew
had hiked to Wardens gorge to watch the carnage. We looked at the super high water levels
with envy and, when the Sunday paddlers returned, sat in covetous rapture listening to
their tales of insane waves and rapids.
After a lot more faff we packed up and I found a beer in my tent which I quickly
consumed. We returned to Leeds and marvelled at the weekend that had been. That night as
I fondled by pillow girlfriend katia I couldn’t help feel that the pillow beneath my head
was way too soft and I was way too sober and dry. In the end I settled for staying sober
and dry and swapped my “zzzzzz” pillow for the uni hoodie that I’d grown accustomed to
the past few days.. bliss. Due to the very strange underwater dreams I’d been having I
found I could now roll on both sides when I reached the pool..not only had I gotten drunk
but I felt a little more experienced and had learnt a little more! My second discovery was,
to my dismay, that the only pictures of me that weekend involve me swimming. Doh.
By Ollie Margetts